allthisshitisweird | Test Drive Meme!

No, Seriously, You're Never Getting Out Of Here

Maybe the Inquisition sent you, maybe you came seeking the Inquisition. Maybe you fell out of a rift into this world last week and are still just trying to find your feet. However it happened, early fall finds you in the Hinterlands. Tucked between Ferelden's massive Lake Calenhad and the icy Frostback Mountains, the Hinterlands are a hilly region covered in patchy forests and small farms trying to eke out a living between the boulders. Though somewhat remote, the area is rich with game and minerals and home to Redcliffe, a bustling town on a busy trade route.

Lately the Hinterlands have also been full of mages and templars and rifts, all threatening to turn once-peaceful countryside into a dangerous warzone. The Inquisition has set up several camps and sent personnel to try to restore order to the region, unwilling to let it slip into chaos. There's a lot to be done, some of it straightforward killing bad things, some of it weird and nebulous morale-building.

NOTE: We will not have an App Help/Enable Me meme this month, but anyone who has questions about OC concepts or AU adaptations is welcome to ask for assistance on the Mod Contact page.

1. WHERE THE SUN COMES UP ABOUT TEN IN THE MORNING

QUESTS COME AND GO BUT BEARS ARE ETERNAL: You have turned the wrong corner, forded the wrong stream, crested the wrong hill, entered the wrong cave. Maybe you are far from camp. Maybe you are in camp. Whatever has happened, wherever you are: you are being chased by bears. Did you provoke the bears? Are they huge? Babies? Fade-touched? Mage-controlled? What are they chasing you away from? What are they chasing you into? What do you plan to make out of their hide if you kill them? What do you think they'll craft out of your hide if they kill you?

2. THEY MOVED DOWN SOUTH OF REDCLIFFE

NICE PLACE FOR A SPOT OF CAMPING: If there were an inn, which there's not, there wouldn't be room for you in it. Traveling with the Inquisition means carrying your own bedrolls, putting up your own tents, and sleeping alongside whoever you've been told to share with--no matter how much you hate them or how loud they snore. If you really can't stand it, the alternative is sleeping outside. On the ground. With the bears.

3. AND THEY LAUGHED AND SANG A NEW SONG

Hey, there's a big, crazy light in the sky that craps out demons! Let's worship it!: Not everyone thinks the Breach was a bad thing. In the southeastern mountains, a burgeoning cult has taken up residence in Winterwatch Tower to wait patiently for the Maker to reach through the tears in the veil and gather the faithful to his bosom. They're a little kooky, maybe, but harmless, and they're happy enough to share their wine and lager with travelers in the area. The demon-spewing rift behind the Tower, on the other hand... Too bad the Herald didn't close that thing before she bit it. Watch your step.

4. NO ONE EVER KNEW THERE WAS LYRIUM IN THEM MOUNTAINS

TROUBLE IN THE DEEP: The Carta is everywhere, but it's here in force, occupying dwarven ruins in a chasm behind a waterfall. Inquisition forces have already cleared most of the smugglers out of the hold, but there's still a vault to break into, bodies to loot, and old texts to search through for anything worth adding to the Inquisition's growing archives. Also: darkspawn. Sorry.

5. AND THE SUN GOES DOWN ABOUT THREE IN THE DAY

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE: hunt game, kill demons, gather herbs, track bandits, haggle over the price of armor, fall off a deceptively tall rock, get lost circling the same hill ten times trying to find a way up to the weird glowing skull on a stick you can see is up there, climb trees or abandoned towers, rummage around in empty homes, run from a dragon, cry over how cute that fennec fox you just shot was, set up camp and chat around the fire, knock yourself out (figuratively, or even literally if that's more your speed)-- the Hinterlands are your ~~Frostback Mountain~~ oyster.

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[Vayne heaves a thespian sigh, the ends up it turning lighter as he seeks to hide his own exhausted humor. Coming so unexpectedly to this world, all has been only but a fight for survival, and such a personal one, what experience he has with this sort of living is...well, none to brag about.]

Faram's blessing then seeks thus to shine upon our meager selves at such a gift. What men shall we be if not shades were the feline to ne'er relinquish purifying assent. [He wonders if he should extend a hand.] I am called Vayne, by what name may I know my fireside companion - ?

[A strange fellow, but Anders couldn't judge. He was quite strange as well, after all. Instead he just watches, a small smile on his lips as the man dramatically introduces himself with such eloquence.

Then he asks his name, and Anders' face falls a bit.]

...I'm Karl.

[Anders was too dangerous these days, but his chosen alias carried it's own bittersweetness.]

[The slight fall does not go unnoticed, but as with any slight deviation, the Solidor, used to politics and playing mind games, tucks them away. While at the moment they mean little, they slowly come together to paint a picture of the man he shares the warmth of the fire with.]

Karl? [It's a soft test of the name covered up by the repetition, the only evidence of Vayne's struggle to place where he has found himself, sorting through in his mind all of his experiences and training which each lilt of the other's voice.] Have you yet long dwelled in this area?

[It was a question that needed some thought. How long had he been, in this area? After the war started, he had gone with the rebel mages, but after they kicked him out, he'd been back and forth over the Free Marches and eventually Ferelden.

As for this specific area?]

Not long. I... wander.

[Vayne nods, recognizing yet again another moment of hesitance, but the emotion behind it..? He's not sure what it is. It's...intriguing.]

[His lips purse.]
Wherein the beasts are want to follow, wailing and gnashing their teeth?
[It may be a slight confession of his own troubles since coming here.]

You've met the bears, I hear.

[Really, what the fuck was in the water around here that made the bears.... like that? So many, too!]

There's usually less bears involved.

[Vayne dips his head, avoiding a grimace in favor of a sarcastic lilt.]

'Twas not for a lack of trying to maintain some quiet - not all encased herein enjoy such noise-making hounding sanity. [He begins to pick and work to remove the mud that clings to his clothes, taking care to shuffle the brittle pieces off, flicking them away.] More cats in turn, I hope?

It would be quite an improvement, wouldn't it? Cats ambushing you, begging for treats? I'll send a note to the Maker to fix that.

[He chuckles softly, even in the humor doesn't quite reach his eyes.]

Where are you from, serah Vayne?

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