allthisshitisweird | TEST DRIVE MEME!

I ROLL TO SEDUCE THE BEAR

Tucked between the massive Lake Calenhad and the icy Frostback Mountains in Ferelden’s chilly, hilly south, the Hinterlands are a region covered in patchy forests, small farms, and a bustling fishing village called Redcliffe. The region was recently the frontline of a war between mages and Templars, but the Inquisition’s military presence has restored order and is now focused on helping the locals and influx of refugees rebuild their lives. Whether you’re a recent recruit or a hardened veteran, a Fereldan local or someone who recently fell out of a rift from another world, you may be asked to go lend a hand.

I. FLOODS

A burst of unseasonably warm weather (in no way inspired by real life events) is initially greeted with relief, gloves discarded and scarves unwrapped—but followed within the week by severe flooding across the region. Maybe you’re sent out to help debris from a road or collect the bodies of those swept away. Or maybe you’re less lucky and instead there when the waters come, shepherding refugees to higher ground, or caught riding in the flow on a dislodged roof or log. Maybe there’s a bear on the roof with you.

II. TREASURE HUNTS

Given the lack of banks and lockboxes, when the people here have something they value, they often hide it—under the ground, in a tree, behind a waterfall. So here you are, with a sketch of some landmarks found on a body, trying to find… something. If you find it, it might be useful: weapons, runes, a stash of supplies. Or it might be someone’s box of racy letters and a request to deliver them to a now-married woman who will slap you on delivery.

III. BEARS

You have turned the wrong corner, forded the wrong stream, crested the wrong hill, entered the wrong cave. Maybe you are far from camp. Maybe you are in camp. Whatever has happened, wherever you are: you are being chased by bears. Did you provoke the bears? Are they huge? Babies? Fade-touched? Mage-controlled? What are they chasing you away from? What are they chasing you into? What do you plan to make out of their hide if you kill them? What do you think they'll craft out of your hide if they kill you?

IV. CRYSTALS

Members and trusted agents of the Inquisition are given access to one of the Inquisition's stores of ancient, mysterious sending crystals, allowing them to communicate instantaneously by voice. It's magic. And a magical excuse to ask everyone what their favorite constellation is in the middle of the night.

Or to call for help because you've been treed by bears.

Either way.

V. MISCELLANEOUS

Choose your own adventure! Hunt game, kill demons, gather herbs, track bandits, haggle over the price of armor, fall off a deceptively tall rock, get lost circling the same hill ten times trying to find a way up to the weird glowing skull on a stick you can see is up there, climb trees or abandoned towers, rummage around in empty homes, run from a dragon, cry over how cute that fennec fox you just shot was, set up camp and chat around the fire, knock yourself out (figuratively, or even literally if that's more your speed)—the Hinterlands are your Frostback Mountain oyster.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Rhys was shocked at the strength of the woman who took his hand. She was stronger than most male Templars. The sudden jolt against his arm was enough to nearly pull it out of the socket, the current was so strong. Suddenly he saw a rope that seemed to be made of pure gold but his curiosity about it was cut off suddenly as the current nearly pulled him under. He quickly took hold of the rope. Hoped it would hold him.

When he was finally on the bank, he coughed out water for a few moments before he felt like he could nearly breathe properly. When he could finally speak - sort of - he coughed out a few words. "Maker." He looked at the woman. "Thank you."

The task is not an easy one. She must fight the current and the burn of exhaustion. But she is an Amazon. Diana has been many things, but she will always be an Amazon. That means keep fighting, keep hauling on the lasso till there's firm ground under their feet.

Then she allows herself to flop down on her back in the mud and muck. "You are most welcome," she tells the man, smiling over at him, "Are you hurt at all?"

Not that she's really in a position to do anything about that at the moment, but Diana has her priorities.

Rhys moved different parts of his body as much as he could. And finally shook his head.

"Bumps and bruises mostly. I'll need one of the mages to look at my shoulder."

He could probably heal it himself, but why expend the extra energy when he didn't have to? They were as safe as they were going to get, for now.

"Are you?"

Given the strength she had shown, he doubted it, but it's always best to offer.

"Not as steady on my feet as I would like to be," says the woman lying in the mud, with a grin. "I'll need a moment before I can stand, I'm afraid."

She does frown a little, "My apologies for the rough grab, I'm glad you're well."

He nods and smiles. He himself had settled back into resting against the ground.

"I think a few minor injuries are acceptable considering the alternative."

He sounds amused, though. It's a bit of a morbid joke, but then given all he's been through - well, no his jokes have always been a little odd.

"You have no need to apologise. I would help you up, but I need another minute myself."

Diana hums a laugh. Exhaustion was certainly awful, but she didn't mind the giddy feeling that seemed to come with it. It certainly helps that her new companion is an amiable one.

"I would say something about the weather being perfect for a short rest, but that may be tempting the gods." Or whatever spirits preside over this world. Either way. "I'm Diana."

Her language, well her entire being, was different from anything Rhys had ever seen before. He wasn't quite sure how to react to that. He had heard of these 'rifters' arriving, but he had no idea they could be like... this.

He looks over at her. "Nice to meet you. I'm Rhys."

He'd offer his hand or a nod or something, but he's just too tired to move properly yet.

Diana was quite accustom to be the woman out of time, just slightly displaced from the people around her.

"And you, Rhys." A few moments longer and she forces herself upright, grunting a little from the strain. "Do you have companions you need to find?" Because no, she can not actually stand resting for longer than five minutes.

He groans softly as he starts to move into a more upright position.

"Find? No, not find. As far as I know, they're all in... that direction."

Yes, he's being a bit more literal than usual. It's one of the ways he tries to inject humour into things. He gestures in the general direction of Skyhold.

"And you... You don't look like you come from around here, so are you looking for companions? Or are you here on your own?"

TEST DRIVE MEME!

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