The YASS IN LAOS Meme

[byblow]

The Your Anonymous Secret Survey
Is No Longer Anonymous Or Secret Meme



[A] THEDAS HAS COMPUTERS. Or something.
[B] You were promised that this survey would be anonymous and secret.
[C] And were possibly paid money to answer it. Whatever it would take.
[D] Now all the surveys are public.
[E] And not anonymous.
[F] Wheeeeeee.
[G] And the floor is lava.

<font face="courier new"><ol><li><b>On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker?</b> <li><b>What is your least favorite thing about yourself?</b> <li><b>When is the last time you cried and why?</b> <li><b>Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked?</b> <li><b>When is the last time you had sex? </b> <li><b>How was it? </b> <li><b>Who was it? </b> <li><b>Did anyone cry? </b> <li><b>Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to.</b> <li><b>If you've never had sex, why not?</b> <li><b>How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition?</b> <li><b>Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other?</b> <li><b>Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked?</b> <li><b>What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go?</b> <li><b>Who is your second favorite advisor?</b> <li><b>Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold?</b> <li><b>What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of?</b> <li><b>What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all.</b> <li><b>Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them?</b> <li><b>If no one else were around would you still bathe?</b> <li><b>Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around?</b> <li><b>Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it.</b> <li><b>Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes?</b> <li><b>It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it.</b> <li><b>If you could design the uniforms what would they look like?</b> <li><b>Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons.</b> <li><b>Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them?</b> <li><b>A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies?</b> <li><b>If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why?</b> <li><b>Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What?</b> <li><b>Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?</b> </font>

Comments

merrill

[chainlightning]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 10? I mean, I don't have one but I believe in the Creators, so.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Everyone leaves me. Also I get lost a lot in cities.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? A few days ago, everyone kept marking me as "kill" on Zevran's questions.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Oh. Um. I have to pick? I feel like it'd be exciting to see the Iron Bull naked, just because he's so- large.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Never.
   
6. How was it? Non-existent?
   
7. Who was it? No one?
   
8. Did anyone cry? No?
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. There aren't any details!
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Well first it was because everyone thought I was an actual child and now... I don't know?
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Zero? Do kisses on the cheek count?
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Malcolm Reynolds and James Norrington.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Anyone who would stab me?
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? They've all had nice things about them!
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Second favorite? Leliana, I think.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? No one?
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Anders when he's in a bad mood.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Feeling afraid when Anders is in a bad mood.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? Oh- maybe, I suppose? I always thought it would happen when I was with my clan, but now- I guess I don't know.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes. It's nice!
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? The dogs, probably.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. Have you read 'The Tale of the Champion'?
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? The Inquisition? No!
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Do you need a hug?
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Green! And flowy.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. The one Samwise and Galadriel are from.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I don't want to wrestle or arm wrestle with anyone, really.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither! Unless they're horrid nasty people. Then maybe whichever one is worse.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Maybe qunari? They have lovely horns and I'd like to see if followers of the Qun like butterflies and flowers or not.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Blood magic, but I've never used anyone's blood but my own or mind-controlled anyone with it. I cured the Taint from an Eluvian with it, so really, I think everyone (Anders and Fenris especially) is overreacting.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Yay!

[serannas]

[ There is so much to comment on here but one thing sticks out. ]

You cured the Taint? Really?

Oh, I'm sorry. These were supposed to be anonymous, but I could read yours for some reason.

Christine

[aceso]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 5, though the number will probably decrease more.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I suppose I can be too controlling, and cannot always see it.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Last year, during the escape from Orlais to Ferelden with my fellow mages. There were skirmishes with Templars, and I saw many mages cut down.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? I'm quite curious to see what Taas looks like naked.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Perhaps a week ago?
   
6. How was it? Very fun. Incredible.
   
7. Who was it? Asher Hardie
   
8. Did anyone cry? No?
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Asher can actually be quiet, if you bind and gag him.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? N/A
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Maker, only two. I feel cheated.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? I think Sam and Cyril should just kiss already and stop stepping around it.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Sam, Fiona, Adelaide
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Fallow Mire
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Commander Cullen, I suppose.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Anders
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Failing to save someone. I know it is not always possible to save a life, but I always refuse to fail.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Does He? You could have fooled me.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? Yes, I do. Perhaps two or three. I think maybe after my parents? Aimee and Luc.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes, of course.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Asher, which is why I require him to be clean before I'll sleep with him.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. Not really. Unless being in the presence of a talking demon tree counts.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Looking back, I wonder if it was not a complete waste of time, but I am already through most of the questions already. Wait, you were speaking of something else, weren't you?
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. The Inquisition is not pointless.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Blue. Everyone looks nice in blue. Get rid of the awful hats too.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Perhaps James's, as he's traveled the stars in his own ship.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I do not condone violence.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? I only wish death on the truly reprehensible. So Anders.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Maker, that is a difficult one. Perhaps a Vashoth? I would like to see the world from a little higher, but have no desire to live under the Qun.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? I do not believe so. During our escape from Orlais, I did have to fight, but only in defense of myself and others.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Well, I must say yay, though he would probably wish for nay. Are you asking everyone this question? How embarrassing for him.

[justice_is_blond]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 1. I've no faith in him giving a damn, he doesn't give a damn about me. It works.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My past.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? The other day, when we killed someone who had once been a friend.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Blackwall, Adelaide, Iron Bull.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? The 18th.
   
6. How was it? Exceptional.
   
7. Who was it? Nate.
   
8. Did anyone cry? No.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. I actually don't.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Oppressive societies and rules as far as reasons for others.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? What, I'm supposed to keep track?
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Zevran and Nate again.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? I don't care if they do.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Deep roads again. Yes I know I'm a warden. I hate the deep roads.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Josephine. She seems nice which means she's probably murdery, but she's polite about it.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? The cook who isn't fine with my kitten getting scraps that people wouldn't want to eat anyway.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Things being too quiet.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Too much to list. Most guilty? All of the injured who got hurt by Vengeance.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? Yes. I don't know, but I want a boy to name Karl.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? All the Orlesians who are wearing altogether too much perfume.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. everything with Oghren, all of my escapes. The best was when everyone was drunk and thought the best idea ever was hiding Seneschal Varel's clothing all over the keep. We were too drunk, though, and the clothing we thought was Varel's wasn't. It belonged to Mistress Woolsey. We never admitted who had done it, and she couldn't murder everyone in Vigil's Keep, which means my involvement has stayed secret for far too long.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Yes.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. I did.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? I like Warden robes.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Hermione's.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I'd be wrestled into the dirt by Blackwall gladly. I'd arm-wrestle Merrill.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Really?
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Cat.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Be me.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?

Sweet maker no.

[pinprick]

We could arrange for #12.

[pinprick]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 2
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My nose.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? When my nephew was born. Eleven years ago.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? That show is available to me any time I please.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Last week.
   
6. How was it? Astounding.
   
7. Who was it? Anders.
   
8. Did anyone cry? Only the people who could hear us.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. I didn't pull out of him for hours.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? I'm having quite a lot of sex.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? One.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Anders and Zevran, I think.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Alistair, I think.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Orlais.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? The adorable little one with the sleeves.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Erimond.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Bugs.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Being the child of my parents.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? No, no, and no.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Every day.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? The Warden-Constable.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I once beat an elf at archery while drunk and holding a music box of a bronto in my mouth.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Not anymore.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Not anymore.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? They'd have "Fuck you, Orlais" embroidered on the chest.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. None of them. I like mine.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I'd wrestle the Warden-Constable, if only to settle which of us is stronger once and for all.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Depends. Is one of them Orlesian?
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? An elf. I'd like the night vision.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? I'm the son of the Butcher of Denerim. I'm occasionally surprised that it and of itself doesn't have them itching to put me away.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?

Nay.

[byblow]

TOO

MUCH

INFORMATION

Ellana

[serannas]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? I have no relationship with the Maker. I'm Dalish. We have our own gods.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I guess it would be that I'm not as smart as I wish I was.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? I cried when I came back from the Western Approach, because I almost died there and I was relieved to see everyone again.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Felix. It doesn't have to be anyone else. Just Felix.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Oh, this is embarrassing. Ten years ago.
   
6. How was it? Very nice.
   
7. Who was it? His name was Atlan.
   
8. Did anyone cry? I often cried during sex. I'm just over emotional when I'm happy like that.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Oh no, it was so long ago. I was only seventeen, and in hindsight, the sex probably wasn't that wonderful. We had no idea what we were doing.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? N/A
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Two: Zevran and Felix.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Do you mean if they aren't already? Kallian and Jamie?
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? I'm not sure! We Dalish don't have much privacy to begin with. There's no one I can think of that I would die of embarrassment over seeing me naked.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Fallow Mire.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Leliana
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? I think we've all earned our place here, haven't we?
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Being called a race traitor. I'm afraid that's what they're all thinking.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. I do feel guilty about the dangers we encountered in the elven ruin, even if we all knew there would be trouble going in.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I'm not sure yet. My parents died when I was little, and I worry about something happening to me and the father of my children. I don't want that to be a possibility. If I did... maybe just one. I'm an only child myself.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Oh, yes.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? You're asking me who smells? I don't know. Probably someone who sleeps in the stables.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I'm not sure if it counts, but I climbed onto a crumbling roof to spy on Avvar. Is that an escapade?
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Of course not! The Inquisition is helping people.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. No, it's not pointless.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Please, no more uniform talk. It was bad enough when the Mage Council did it and I didn't care then either.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Araceli's world sounds beautiful!
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? No one because I would lose! Would someone let me win? Then that person.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither. You didn't say they'd done anything wrong.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? If I had to be? I don't want to be anything else, but if there was no choice but to pick one, then a human. But only because no one would hate me on sight. I really don't want to be human at all.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? No, I don't think so.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Doing what in a towel? Just standing around? Am I running into him coming out of the hot springs? I guess I wouldn't mind seeing that.

[blightedson]

I'd let you win.

Lena

[fightingdirty]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? What relationship? Is that fucker cheating on Andraste? What a cock.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Nothing. I'm perfect.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? I don't cry.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? All of them.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? I don't know. Maybe two months ago? Three?
   
6. How was it? All right.
   
7. Who was it? You expect me to remember names?
   
8. Did anyone cry? Fuck no.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Lots of biting, scratching, and I know I threw him into a wall at some point.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? N/A
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? None.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Like I give a fuck.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Fuck if I know.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Western Approach. No, Deep Roads. What a shit hole.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Fuck if I know.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Got no problem with anyone enough to kick their ass out the front gate.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? I'm not afraid of anything. And if I was, I'd be a dumb shit to admit to it.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. I don't feel guilty for shit.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? Fuck no.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Eventually.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Probably Asher. That fucker is surrounded by goat and chicken shit.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I'm not wasting time writing it out, but it involved intimidating a guy who ended up literally pissing his pants.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Sure does.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Already did.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? What uniforms?
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Like I've been sitting here enraptured by rifters.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Shit, I should wrestle Asher. That would be a good tussle. Arm wrestle Mal because Maker knows he'd whine if he wasn't invited.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Templar.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Fuck, they're all terrible. Human, I guess, because those assholes think they run everything anyway.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Nah. I've done some terrible shit, but it's not like the Inquisition can do jack shit about it.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Who?

[mythalenaste]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 10
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I have no charm and people don't usually like me. And my jaw juts out.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? A few months ago, I think? I don't remember.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Blackwall and Aleron.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Haring, I think.
   
6. How was it? Really, really good.
   
7. Who was it? Zevran.
   
8. Did anyone cry? No.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Not really.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Sort of moot because I've had it, but why does anyone care?
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Two or three.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Alistair and Zevran. Come on.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? The one that beat the shit out of me a few months back.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Cold bog down south.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Cullen.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? The one that beat the shit out of me a few months back.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Corpses.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Everything.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? Yes. Many as I can have. I want to name my first daughter Sina.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes. I don't want fleas.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Two-thirds of the Inquisition's soldiers, by the smell of them.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. No. I'm pretty boring. For escapades you'd have to talk to my clanmates.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Yes.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Yes.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? My relationship with uniforms is complicated.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Araceli's. It sounds exotic.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Normal wrestling. As a wolf.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Templar.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? If I absolutely had to be, I'd be human. People listen more to you when you're human.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? No, and I wish I had.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?

Yea. He's not bad at all.

[samahl]

You have more charm than you give yourself credit for and your jaw is lovely.

And Alistair and Zevran? That's a fun mental image, thank you for it.

[quietblade]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 0? I don't think I believe in the Maker.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My anger.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Several years ago. It was an emotional discussion.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Anyone, as long as they're enjoying it too.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Yesterday.
   
6. How was it? Pretty damn amazing.
   
7. Who was it? None of your business.
   
8. Did anyone cry? No. I don't really do the kind of stuff that makes people cry very often.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Yeah no, details are our business. It was hot, though.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? If I'd never had sex it was probably because I didn't want to?
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Somewhere around forty.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Cyril and Zevran.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Any of the kids.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Western Approach. It wasn't horrible but it was annoying.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Second? I don't know Lady Josephine, so I suppose Leliana? Or is Cassandra an Advisor?
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Nobody right now. We'll see.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Myself.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Bullshit. But I guess breaking that soldier's nose during training.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? No.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Of course. I wear armor and leather, after all. It gets grimy fast.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Asher, probably. It's not bad, though.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. Not really. Sorry to disappoint.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Yes.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. I did.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? They look fine as it is. More gorgets for guards, though. Too easy to slit their throats right now.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. I don't know enough Rifters well enough to decide that.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Taaranda looks like she could give me a good match! In both things. Least? Probably someone I might accidentally hurt.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither. It's a trick question and I'm not getting involved.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? A dwarf. It would be interesting to see how it is to be that compact.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Why would anyone answer his, even if it is anonymously?
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?

Yay.

[scalethewall]

But seriously, is Cassandra an advisor? She was my answer as well.

...

Maker. She was my answer for the second favorite advisor question NOT any of the other questions.

Zevran Arainai

[ombranera]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 10. He remains gone and I am left to my business. What better relationship is there?
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? That I'm a father.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Last night. Lucci would not stop crying. Doing so with him did not help.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? That I haven't already?
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Over two months ago. Maker's breath, I need someone to mind Lucci so I can fix that.
   
6. How was it? Marvelous.
   
7. Who was it? A gentleman does not kiss and tell. Or bed and tell, so to speak.
   
8. Did anyone cry? After hanging on the edge for an hour, wouldn't you?
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. There was rope, oil, and wax involved. We took all night. It was a thing of beauty.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Possibly because no one had asked, in this hypothetical world where I have never.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Quality over quantity, my friends.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? That I haven't already? Leliana and Morrigan.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? I do not understand the question- am I to be ashamed of my body?
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Follow Mire. Mud, the undead, more mud, more undead. It was horrible.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Josephine.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Cade Harimann
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? again the questions with shame.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Filling out this form and letting Mia handle Lucci instead of handling him myself.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I never wanted a son and yet I have one. Would you like him? He's healthy and has all of his teeth. Or. Will, in a few months.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Of course! Who do you take me for, Oghren?
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? The stable hands. THey smell of shit already, that will never wash out.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. Have you heard the tale of the fifth blight? The one where they actually mention the elven assassin? That's me! I like the part where we revive a golem in Honnleath, ah. That is a fun tale. Or when we find the urn of sacred ashes. It was a lovely urn, I would have kept it for my house if I had one. Or perhaps when we slayed the Archdemon by firing ballista? Sneaking into Fort Drakon? Freeing riddling giants from cages- wait, I wasn't about for that part, but I do like to hear it. Many know the story but I do not know if many hear of those of us that weren't human. Strange thing, that.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? More often than you would think.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. I just did.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Sleek and dangerous, well armored but stylish- also easy to move about in- less skirts and feathers for the mages and more rope.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Araceli's. I would see this world that is mostly ocean and children are only ever had when they are wanted.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Most: The Iron Bull, I would lose, but it would be marvelous fun. Least: Cassandra. I would lose and it would hurt. Arm wrestle: Cullen. Just to watch his face.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Whichever one I am paid to kill.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Human. So much of my life would be different were I human.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Quite a bit, and I am going to speak of none of it. I am an assassin paid for my discretion, of course.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Can we, perhaps, remove the towel?

[samahl]

I would pay to watch you and Iron Bull wrestle.

Also, I'd happily watch your son if you needed some time alone. I promise I'm decent with children.

Aleron

[lifeofendurance]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 10
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I'm dull.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Never.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? That's entirely inappropriate.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? 15 years ago
   
6. How was it? That is between me and my wife.
   
7. Who was it? My wife, Mirielle.
   
8. Did anyone cry? Maker, no!
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Absolutely not.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? n/a
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? None.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? What? That's none of my business.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? All of them.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Fade.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Lady Montilyet.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? No one?
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? I know of nothing like that.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. That I didn't take a harder look at what was happening in Kirkwall.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I do. A houseful. But it won't happen so names are irrelevant.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Of course.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Perhaps some of the refugees outside the gates? I have no idea.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. No never.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Not at all. This was the Divine's final mandate. Enacting it honors her and her memory.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. No.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? I have no opinion.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. I... have no preference.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? It seems rather pointless.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither. What sort of question is that?
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Perhaps an elf? They have a rich history. And I could remain faithful to the Maker.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? No never.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? What does that matter? Is he fresh from a bath or something?

[serannas]

Here I was starting to think I was the only one who hadn't slept with someone in a very long time.

[ This is... perhaps not the best way to introduce herself. ]

Korrin

[gatheringstorm]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 5. The Chantry itself? 1. Fuck you, Chantry.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? How difficult it is to get anything my size that isn't custom-made.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Probably during that 'plague' because I was so frustrated about being useless.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Araceli, of course. If I had to pick someone else...probably Fenris, because I'm curious about the tattoos and how far they go.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? You mean today? A few hours ago.
   
6. How was it? Pretty damn awesome.
   
7. Who was it? Araceli.
   
8. Did anyone cry? No.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Let's just say it was somewhere we could have been caught. Still worth it.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? n/a
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? At least three.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Mal and Merrill, because why the hell not.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Why would I care if I'm spotted naked? If Cade seeing me doesn't raise that 'give a fuck' meter, no one will.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? THE FADE. Also the Fallow Mire as the runner-up.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Second? What an odd choice. Leliana, I guess.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Anders and Cade.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Not much. And I wouldn't list it here, even in confidence.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. The Maker can kiss my shapely ass. That's not to say I haven't done anything, just that I don't feel guilty about it.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I only have the one via Araceli and his name is Lux. I'm pretty sure he wants no competitors.
    
    (I dunno, maybe one day via adopting. I'm not giving birth to anyone.)
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes, it helps those sore muscles out.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Asher.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. Well, there was that one time that snooty Orlesian noble wouldn't pay my company what we were owed and ordered us off his property, so some of us snuck back an blew the head off the statue of his ancestor that he was so damn proud of. Good times.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Only during council meetings that have gone on way too long.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? More like my own armor. Everyone looks good in dragon hide and dragon scales. Everyone.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Araceli's, so I could understand her culture better.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Most: Asher, Lena, Taaranda, Meoni, Taas...because they're big and I know they can take it. I'd worry too much if there was a huge size difference. Sina; because I'd break her.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? The Templar, of course.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Human. I'd still get shit because of the mage thing, but at least I wouldn't have other sorts of bigotry added onto it.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Not since joining up, no.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Nay.

[serannas]

Oh, Mal and Merrill would be so cute!

[ Korrin, you have introduced her to a new ship. ]

alistair

[byblow]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker?
   1, he doesn't even call me on my birthday.
   
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself?
   its hard to choose between my nose and my inability to do anything right
   flip a coin
   
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why?
   Adamant Fortress. having nearly everyone you know die in one swoop doesn't get easier with age, apparently!
   
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked?
   benevenuta. sabine. velanna.
   respectfully of course
   
   
5. When is the last time you had sex?
   2 years ago? 3? i need a calendar
   
   
6. How was it?
   all right.
   
   
7. Who was it?
   her name was lydie
   
   
8. Did anyone cry?
   maker no
   
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to.
   she preferred it when I didn't talk
   
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not?
    :)
    
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition?
    zero
    
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other?
    zevran and people who deserve him
    
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked?
    morrigan. adelaide. leliana. FIONA
    
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go?
    orlais. all of it, the whole thing
    
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor?
    cassandra pentaghast
    if the inquisition decides we need to go i hope she's the one to kill me
    
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold?
    michel de chevin, but i think he's already gone.
    
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of?
    being left behind, being responsible for other people, morrigan as a spider, morrigan as not a spider
    
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all.
    question #4
    
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them?
    i barely know what to do with the one I have.
    sort of have.
    no more.
    duncan, though.
    
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe?
    probably not.
    
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around?
    nathaniel howe. you dont have to keep this question a secret, you can spread it sround
    
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it.
    i could do with fewer people knowing anything honestly
    
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes?
    yes
    
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it.
    good
    
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like?
    more blue, everyone looks nice in blue
    
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons.
    the one with fairies with funny names, it sounds charming and ib et there arent holes in the sky
    
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them?
    most, sabine. sovereign says she bites
    least, shale
    i don't have to explain that
    
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies?
    all other things equal, the templar is more likely to be a prick
    
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why?
    i don't want to be short or oppressed if there's an alternative, and i suppose people aren't always nice to qunari either, but at least they're intimidated
    
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What?
    i'm sure ive done things that might make them want to...
    
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?
    nay nay nay nay nay

[samahl]

Let me just say that your nose is beautiful.

deadpans

[rowancrowned]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 0
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My inability to find fault with myself.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Plaideweave was involved.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? The Outsider.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Approximately two thousand years ago.
   
6. How was it? Glorious. Legolas was begotten.
   
7. Who was it? My wife.
   
8. Did anyone cry? Both of us. Truly, it was beyond description.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Beyond description.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not?
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? None.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? The small pink nug and the small spotted nug touched snouts. One was in a small dress. It was ... precious.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? The bearded human one.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Western Approach.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Cassandra.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Cassandra.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Spiders.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Taking that bottle of Tevene wine.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I have always wished for a daughter.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Daily.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? The bearded human.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. No.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? No.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Green. Red flatters very few.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Thedas is enough of an adventure.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Cassandra.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? I have, in odd moments, reluctantly wondered what it might be like to be a Man.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Being an elf is apparently enough.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Ah, so he is bathing.

[samahl]

Plaideweave is indeed a thing worth weeping over.

he was paid cash money

[dalishious]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? I don't care.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Everything.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? No.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? No.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Last night.
   
6. How was it? Wouldn't you like to know.
   
7. Who was it? Not you.
   
8. Did anyone cry? No.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. No.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? n/a
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Who uses the word snog?
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Stop saying snog.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? All of them.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Fallow Mire.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? I don't really care about any of them.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Cade.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? I'm not afraid of anything.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Putting trip wire around the stables.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I don't want any.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes?
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? I don't get close enough to people to notice.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. My brother and I used to trick humans who set up camp around our borders. He'd seduce them or set traps, and I'd steal them blind. It was a good way to pass the time.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? All the time.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Great? I don't feel guilty about saying that.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Pass.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Where Samwise and Galadriel are from.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I can arm wrestle anyone.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Both.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? A qunari probably. Sometimes I really wish I were bigger.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Why the fuck would I write it here?
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? I could not give less of a fuck.

[samahl]

Since you seem to dislike everything about yourself, let me list five things about you that are wonderful:

1 - Your eyes. They're a very lovely shade of blue.
2 - Your loyalty. Those who have earned it know just how fierce and unyielding it is.
3 - Your passion. You let yourself care deeply about things that are worth caring about.
4 - Your grace. You move beautifully when needed, even more when there are daggers involved.
5 - Your drive. You fight to win, and do anything you can do do so.

[samahl]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? I do not believe in the Maker
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? The lying gets a bit old after a while.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? I was young. My mother died.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? All of them.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Last night.
   
6. How was it? Excellent.
   
7. Who was it? The better question is who wasn't it?
   
8. Did anyone cry? During sex? I'm concerned about how you have sex. Unless that's something you and your partner are into. In that case, I hope you had fun.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. You'd think that would be the case, wouldn't you? I certainly give the impression of being happy to share all of the details, don't I?
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Hahaha.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Snogged? Honestly?
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Samouel Gareth and Taashath
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Cassandra Pentaghast
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Fallow Mire.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Cullen, purely for the eyecandy.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? No one really.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Spiders. I grew up in the woods, what a silly thing to be frightened by.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. My lack of faith, seeing as you keep bringing up the Maker.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I do, I suppose. Or more likely I'm certain I'll have them. I'll likely have as many as their mother and I can stand and name them good, strong Dalish names. Keeping the blood line alive and all of that.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Absolutely. In fact, I'd bathe more often.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? What a silly thing to think about someone.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. My brother and I once lured two bandits into a cave. I got them out of their armor by convincing them that they could both have me, then right in the middle of getting them hot and bothered, my brother swooped in and took all of their belongings. The poor things had to run back to their camp completely in the nude.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? No.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. I'm once again worried about your mental health.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? The men would have tiny metal loin clothes and the women would have heavy armor that would protect them in a fight but be mobile enough that they could easily move.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Martin's. I'm curious about trying that aspirin thing he told me about.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I'm not a fan of arm wrestling myself. Though rolling around in the dirt always sounds fun. Can I say most of the men here?
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither, I hope that the mage doesn't have to worry about losing his/her freedom though.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Tal-Vashoth or Vashoth, more chances to get with their men.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? I think I mentioned that bit with the bandits above?
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? YES PLEASE

blackwall

[scalethewall]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? Uh... maybe a 7? Wait, giving this answer doesn't mean someone is going to hassle me and ask me if I have a moment to talk about Andraste does it?
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Where to start?
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? I don't think I can remember.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Oh. Uh. Well. This isn't really a very appropriate question is it?
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? What kind of survey is this???
   
6. How was it? No.
   
7. Who was it? No.
   
8. Did anyone cry? No!
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Please make this stop.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? I have. Next question.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Maker. None. None.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? ... wait. Who hates each other? Cassandra and Varric maybe?
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? No one deserves that kind of abuse honestly.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? It's Southern Thedas... nowhere's nice.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Second? Is Seeker Pentaghast an advisor? It'd be her.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Uh... no one?
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Um, I'm not really embarrassed of anything I'm afraid of.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Pass.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I think so. How many? You know, a house full, give or take. I'm not sure about names. Do people think about that kind of thing before they've even found someone to marry?
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Hahahahaha
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Hahahahaaaa.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. Nope. I've never participated in nor do I have any knowledge of escapades or shenanigans that may or may not be occurring around the Inquisition.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? This survey? A bit, yea.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Alright. The survey seems completely useless.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? More griffins? Everyone likes griffins.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Um. Maybe Lady Galadriel's.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Aveline. Bull. Anyone, really. Arm wrestle or wrestle-wrestle, challenger's choice.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither? They're getting drinks together, obviously it's some kind of secret rendez vous. Just let 'em be.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? A dwarf maybe? Good beards. Sturdy. Or maybe a Qunari. Bigger swords ;)
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Uh. Pass.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Are we about to arm wrestle, or...?

[gatheringstorm]

Cassandra and Varric? I can work with that.

[liberalum]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? I'd give it a middling 5. We'd get on well enough, if it wasn't for his friends.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? There's only one of me.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? I caught sight of my reflection, and wept at its beauty.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? The Commander.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Some weeks ago. It might have been sooner, if the world could hold itself together for any length of time.
   
6. How was it? Good.
   
7. Who was it? The Iron Bull.
   
8. Did anyone cry? Define crying.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. I would, but my jaw still aches at the memory.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Ha!
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Far less than you'd believe.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Cassandra and Varric.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Solas. Unfortunately, that ship sailed.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Emprise du Lion.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Josie.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? The blacksmith. You'd think I'd enslaved his ancestors personally.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Being afraid of nugs is entirely rational.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. That I haven't done more. Not for Evelyn, nor the Inquisition, nor my homeland.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? You sound like my mother, disarmingly.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? What a ridiculous question.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? I'm convinced that the only people who do bathe, properly, are myself, Benevenuta, and Vivienne.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. There was a rather impressive horse race through the streets of Minrathous that resulted in someone's missing tooth, a previously white horse turned deep purple, and several thousand sovereigns' worth of wine flooding a brothel's courtyard. I was eleven.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Only when I'm in that slightly middling area between glasses of wine.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Thank you, survey.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? The scouts can keep their leathers. Tones of heather, and undyed deerskin. No hats. Good boots. Formalwear for advisors and other dignatories should be co-ordinated rather than matched and identical. Deep navy and gold trim would do everyone favours. As far as the soldiers go, as long as they occasional beat the dents out of their breastplates with something more precise than the pommel of their sword, I'd leave their wardrobe to the experts. Oh, but they ought to have cloaks to signify the Inquisition. I would suggest a deep, unassuming burgundy with fennec and the emblem stitched with g [ CHARACTER LIMIT MAX ]
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. The land from which Obi-Wan Kenobi hails must be fascinating.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I don't want to roll in any dirt, thank you.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Whoever's stupid enough to start the fight.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Is this where every human that answers this survey awkwardly tries to navigate matters of prejudice and privilege, height-related or otherwise? Elves, proudly proclaiming they would never be anything else? Qunari, shrugging their massive shoulders, before settling on 'human, I guess'? Dwarves... well, I have no idea what they might say. But I'll be a dwarf. I'll automatically be an outcast, but at least the Qun won't loom at me, and elves are just so spindly.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? I am almost too handsome.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Yay.

[gatheringstorm]

Dwarf, huh? You wouldn't miss having magic?

...how does a horse race turn one purple?

Malcolm Reynolds

[aintwejust]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? -100. If you're gonna be absent tell your damn fanclub to quit talk'n 'bout you and kick'n up shitfits when people try'n to mind themselves don't pay attention to how pious they are.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My shitty luck.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Denerim, ten years ago.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Cassandra.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Six months ago.
   
6. How was it? Pretty nice. Not half bad.
   
7. Who was it? I ain't tell'n you.
   
8. Did anyone cry? If someone's cry'n you're do'n it wrong.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. She could crack skulls with her thighs.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? ???
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? Who what now?
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Why's that important?
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Benevenuta, Dorian, Seeker Squinty, James Norrington.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Anderfels.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Cullen.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Ser Fuckstick of Perfect Hair and Grabbing Hands.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Deepstalkers. Can't stand the sound.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Be'n an ass to a friend. Probably will nurse that one for a little while- and call'n Miss Ruby creepy.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? One day? Sure. I'd like a big family with a dozen fat little kids. Probably name 'em after my Crew.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Shit yeah. Be'n clean is nice. Mud's only fun if it's piss'n off nobles.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Asher, but that's part of his charm.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I stole a buncha potions and books from the University of Orlais while dressed up like one of them fancy scholar types. Someone asked me to sign their books- they thought I was one of their foreign professors. Signed it in Antivan call'n them a poncy twit. It was beautiful. The REALLY GOOD shit- that's me and Asher and Korrin.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Long as I still got a ship and a crew? Nah.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Well that's just defeatist.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Brown.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. The one without poncy noble types boss'n everyone around.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Depends, am I gett'n paid? I'll take a swing at most anyone in a fair fight long as I'm gett'n paid.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither. Ruins a good drink, someone dy'n.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Vashoth. Be'n all big and horned could be fun.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Yep. I ain't gonna say.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Why?

[gatheringstorm]

I knew you had horn envy.

lexa

[heda]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker?
   I do not believe in the Maker. I would rate my relationship with the gods of my people at a 7.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself?
   That I'm too weak to keep my emotions under control
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why?
   After I met Clarke in Emprise du Lion, because she was alive after all but what I did hurt her even more than I feared, and if there was ever any chance before that she might someday have loved me she never will now.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked?
   Clarke Griffin
   
5. When is the last time you had sex?
   Four years ago
   
6. How was it?
   Rushed, not our best, but good
   
7. Who was it?
   Costia
   
8. Did anyone cry?
   No
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to.
   No.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not?
    Since? Because she's dead and Clarke hates me.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition?
    None.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other?
    None. The Nightingale and that dark-haired woman she's always with.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Clarke. It would be awkward. Or that Orlesian woman Gwen. I suspect she would enjoy it too much for comfort. Or Kane, he would be awkward, too.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go?
    They have not made me go anywhere.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor?
    I only know one so far.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold?
    Bellamy Blake.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of?
    Dying alone with nothing to show for my life.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all.
    That I said above that I wanted to see Clarke naked when I know she wouldn't want that. Doubting and defying my augur and the gods. Not doing enough. Wasting time on this survey and my feelings when I should be working. Having feelings to begin with.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them?
    If I had a completely different life it might have been nice to have one or two. Costia was good at names, not me.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe?
    Yes.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around?
    Clarke is the answer to too many of these questions. I'm also not sure about Bellamy or Asher.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it.
    Before I was called to lead my people, I once helped replace Wyrmhold's horses with goats before a race at the summer festival. They had been bragging about their mounts and when they were brought out of the stables they were goats in saddles instead and because of the rules they were forced to ride them around the course. It was more amusing at the time than it sounds now.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes?
    If you mean the Inquisition or this survey, yes. If you mean life, I can't believe that.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like?
    More practical. Leather, fur, mail. No hats.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons.
    The one who says he is from the stars. I would like to see them, as long as I could return home after.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them?
    I would like to try wrestling a qunari. I wonder if they are fast enough to make up for how big they are. I would not like to arm wrestle Merrill, I think I might break her.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies?
    Whichever one is more of a danger to my people. Most likely the Templar.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why?
    A falcon. Or dwarf, but only the kind that live on the surface. I would not want to live underground forever.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What?
    I made a temporary truce with Red Templars in the Emprise in exchange for their release of my people. I also have a shard in my hand, but they seem to be letting people with those remain free now.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?
    Nay. I have no interest but judging from conversations I have overheard it might cause a stampede.

[levered]

I would give you a hard time, but looking at this, I think you'll manage that on your own.

[issala]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 3? I don't know.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? That I'm small.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? I don't cry!
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? What kind of shit question is this? Aren't surveys names and ages and stuff? ...I guess any of the girls around my age, like Hermione?
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? I haven't.
   
6. How was it?
   
7. Who was it?
   
8. Did anyone cry? Is that a thing??
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. ...okay, this really isn't a real survey. The money better be real, though.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Because I've never had a chance to.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? None
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Why would i want to see other people doing that??
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Nobody! This is sick!
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Fallow Mire. I'd say the Fade but that wasn't really planned.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Lady Montili-something.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? The Iron Bull.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Losing this.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Fuck you. Starting this survey makes me feel really fucking guilty about writing things about people.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? Yeah! I think I'd like a few kids, maybe. I'd name them after heroes.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Maybe. It depends.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? A lot of the soldiers, and a lot of the Orlaisians... and then they put flower-smelling stuff on top of it and it's horrible.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I don't really want people to know about them, no.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? What? The world? The Inquisition? This question isn't very clear.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. Well, maybe? I don't know.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? The look's okay right now, but we could use better materials... and he hood is kind of stupid when you have horns are not humam.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Maybe Araceli's? It sounds kinda nice.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I don't wanna wrestle anyone! Especially not if it means something else!
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? The templar. They're all crazy.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Human. People wouldn't judge you for anything if you're human.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Probably. I've stolen stuff and I cut up a merchant once, but I left that all behind!
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? I don't get it. Like, to watch? Ew.

[bookish_lioness]

[Excuse her while she just stares and slowly grows redder and redder. So much for her ever making eye contact with him ever again.]

[amygdalae]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? n/a
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Magic.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? n/a
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? none
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? n/a
   
6. How was it? n/a
   
7. Who was it? n/a
   
8. Did anyone cry? n/a
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. n/a
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? I've never had occasion.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? n/a
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? n/a
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? I've seen every species naked at some point.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Emprise du Lion.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? They are all good people.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Everyone is equally important in the Inquisition.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Fear is always an irrational thing. There is nothing to be embarrassed about.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Nothing.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? No.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes. Hygiene is important.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Too many to list.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. n/a
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? No. Why?
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. No.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? What uniforms?
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Kirk.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I'd rather avoid the possibility of injuries.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Dwarf. They don't have magic.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Saying it would defeat the purpose of not talking about it, wouldn't you say?
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Yay because that means he actually remembered to take the time to shower for hygiene purposes.

Adelaide LeBlanc

[fleurdesel]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? Define satisfied.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I have apparently made myself a lush. I do not intend to fix this.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? A few months ago- I had a jarring recollection of how many of my peers I have lost. It is unsettling.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Taashath. Call it aesthetic curiosity.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? The night of the recent soiree.
   
6. How was it? Adequate.
   
7. Who was it? A dear friend.
   
8. Did anyone cry? No.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. He is far better with his tongue than I woul care to admit, lest he become all the more smug.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? This isn't applicable.
    
11. How many people have you snogged kissed since joining the Inquisition? On the lips? One.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog kiss each other? Iron Bull and Dorian.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? All of them. Especially Alistair.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? The Fade. Though that was less 'made' and more 'happened along the way'
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? Cullen.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Anders. Alistair. Bruce. That strange elf missing half an ear.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? I live on a mountain and lived in a tower and remain terrified of falling from a great height. I have seen the aftermath often enough to know it to be agonizing.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. The aforementioned becoming a lush. Finding it more difficult to actually care about being politic when there is work that needs doing and cannot be done because people are sensitive and might have their precious feelings hurt if they are not treated just so. Perhaps a little guilty for making one of the aforementioned people cry. Only a little.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? No, none, not applicable.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Of course.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Alistair.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I was the lookout for a subtle operation in the Spire wherein a friend of mine used ice magic to add elf ears to every statue, figurine, and painting of Andraste. The templars were not pleased.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? This is a waste of my time, yes.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. If you meant in general, no.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? Ask Dorian and Vivienne, they actually care.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Ruby's. It seems interesting.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I would rather not wrestle myself, might I have a second wrestle Bull and Asher instead?
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither, they ought to walk into separate taverns and not be idiots enough to drink around one another if it would result in violence.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? Dwarf. They cannot be mages, they do not dream.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Not that I am aware of, no.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Give the man back his clothes, please.

[eviscerates]

Of course you want definitions.

Also: Storybrooke or Misthaven?

[glandival]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? 3. There are questions.
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My face says my thoughts too well sometimes.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? I saw a man recently get kicked in the balls by a gelding after he had spooked it. I laughed very hard.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Araceli. Alistair. Merrill. Zevran.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Sometime before I received my shard.
   
6. How was it? It ways alright. Chilly.
   
7. Who was it? One of the elven scouts. I forget his name.
   
8. Did anyone cry? I assume he weeps every day that I do not visit him again.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. Emprise du Lion got very cold at times.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? Do Wardens have a vow of celibacy? Just curious.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? None of them.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? Martel and a donkey.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? Martel and his donkey.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? I like all the places I have been, at least in some ways.
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? The Commander has a hole in his roof. Useful for eavesdropping.
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? Michel de Chevin, over one of the battlements, down a mountainslope, into a frozen river.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Shems. The nobles, mainly.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. I am lying to those I do not want to lie to.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I would want children if they could be safe. I would want some children, perhaps three, so they can look after each other. I haven't thought of names.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? Yes. Most times. At least my hair.
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? I am suspicious of the Wardens in this way.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I think my latest scuffle with Little Miss Gwennie should be more widely told.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? No.
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. A shem wrote this, didn't they. They are so boring sometimes.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? No one needs uniforms.
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Araceli's.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I have already wrestled Gwenaelle. I will wrestle Alistair. I would not wrestle Morrigan. I would win, but at what cost?
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? The Templar.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? A dragon.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? If they knew why I was here, truly.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? Yay. I like shems out of their amor.

[heda]

Why did you wrestle Gwenaelle?

bella's technicolour losers

[eviscerates]

Ruby Lucas

[eviscerates]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? I'm not from here so I don't think I'm qualified to say. I'm not unsatisfied, thiugh? Is 10 polite or should I reel it in?
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? When I couldn't control the Wolf I killed and ate people. It's a big dislike, really.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? oh man I cry so easily. If I eat a good steak I cry.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? not anyone particularly
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? a while ago
   
6. How was it? energetic
   
7. Who was it? Isabela
   
8. Did anyone cry? no, that one time I didn't cry
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. No
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? n/a
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? snogged? Are we British, now?
    Just the one.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? two consenting adults who are stupidly into each other, obviously
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? I don't really care. Nudity isn't a big deal.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? the Fade wasn't my favourite
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? I don't know any of them aside from Cassandra, really
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? someone who can bounce qhen they land
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? mice :(
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Aforementioned murder - being a monster and living when innocent people died. Not finding Emma. Not helping more.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I don't know. Maybe I could commit to a puppy.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? yes
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Wolf nose reveals all, but I'm not telling
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. Snow and I were bandits for a while but it wasn't usually hilarious capers or anything
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? never
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like? more red probably
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. I like mine pretty well
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? Iron Bull for arm qrestling. I need a challenge. Wrestling? Merrill, but it'd be to derail it into a tickle fight
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? neither wow
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? technically I'm not strictly human either
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? not if they knew context, I hope
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay?

that's his call, is he happy in a towel?

Raylan Gibbs

[apostafuckyou]

1. On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied are you by your relationship with the Maker? Ehhh...like a 6? 7?
   
2. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Sometimes I hear my father's voice come out of my mouth.
   
3. When is the last time you cried and why? Don't remember.
   
4. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you most like to see naked? Spicy ambassador lady.
   
5. When is the last time you had sex? Maybe a year ago, which is way too long.
   
6. How was it? Eh.
   
7. Who was it? A girl at the tower.
   
8. Did anyone cry? Not because of the sex.
   
9. Go on, tell us all the details, you know you want to. This question is weird.
   
10. If you've never had sex, why not? I've been having sex with every girl who'd let me since I was fifteen.
    
11. How many people have you snogged since joining the Inquisition? None, I just got here. There's time.
    
12. Which members of the Inquisition would you most like to see snog each other? I don't really know enough people yet.
    
13. Which member(s) of the Inquisition would you least like to see you naked? No one comes to mind.
    
14. What is the worst place the Inquisition has made you go? Nowhere yet. Oh maker. They make you go places?
    
15. Who is your second favorite advisor? I don't know. Cullen?
    
16. Who would you most like to throw out of Skyhold? No one comes to mind yet.
    
17. What are you most embarrassed to be afraid of? Not much.
    
18. What do you feel guilty about right this moment? Don't say nothing. The Maker sees all. Not doing more to protect the kids in the tower.
    
19. Do you want to have children? How many? What will you name them? I suppose. It's never seemed like an option. And I'm a little old now.
    
20. If no one else were around would you still bathe? I just spent eight months on my own, so I know the answer. It's "yes, but not as often."
    
21. Who do you think already doesn't bathe even though there are people around? Not too sure about that Reynolds fella.
    
22. Have you ever been involved in a really amusing crime or escapade that you wish more people knew about? Please describe it. I managed to steal a potato from my neighbor's stores, when I was a teenager, every day for four entire months. The confusion was entertaining.
    
23. Does all of this seem sort of pointless sometimes? Sometimes?
    
24. It's okay, you can say so, we've all thought it. You heard me.
    
25. If you could design the uniforms what would they look like?
    
26. Which Rifter's world would you most want to visit, assuming that they're real and not demons. Don't know them yet.
    
27. Who would you most and least like to wrestle? Arm wrestle? If they're different is it because you know someone with giant arms but no coordination or is it just because you want to roll around in the dirt with them? I wouldn't win against anyone right now, but spicy ambassador lady might be fun. Malcolm Reynolds I'd like to arm wrestle for the sport. As for least, who would beat me most soundly? Them. Let me keep some dignity.
    
28. A mage and a Templar walk into a tavern. Which one do you hope dies? Neither? Why would I want them to die? Depends on what kind of person they are.
    
29. If you had to be one of the races you aren't, which would you pick and why? I'm pretty good with being a human. I suppose dwarf wouldn't be so bad, though.
    
30. Have you done anything that the Inquisition would put you in the dungeon for if they knew about it? What? Depends how crotchety they're feeling that day. Probably nothing, though.
    
31. Commander Cullen in a towel, yay or nay? yay.

[aintwejust]

I BATHE!